This post is written by David McLemore as a companion for Unit 33, Session 3 of The Gospel Project for Adults, Volume 11: From One Nation to All Nations (Spring 2024).

Perhaps the ugliest thing about a church is the strife that arises within it. We have all experienced it. In so many cities, churches are filled with ex-friends from another church. We run from church to church whenever something tough pops up. We confront either too fiercely the sin in others or we confront it not at all. We fail to work toward reconciliation, choosing instead the path of separation.

But if one day we will spend eternity in heaven with other Christians, then why can we not be reconciled to them now? I’m not saying it is easy, but surely it is possible.

How can we get the power to do this? Only from Jesus. We must behold the glory of the reconciling work of Jesus on the cross and let that message sink way deep down into our hearts. We all must do that. It doesn’t work if you do it, and I don’t. We need a shared experience of the grace of God and a shared awe at His grace. We need a gospel culture that permeates every level of our relationships together.

In 2 Corinthians 5:18, Paul calls us to the ministry of reconciliation. He doesn’t say that it’s the pastor’s job to do this. He doesn’t place it in the counselor’s chair. He puts it in all our laps. We are all to be ministers of reconciliation together.

Imagine what the world would look like if we all took this ministry seriously. If we all considered the call to become a minister of reconciliation as seriously as Paul commands us to, then our churches would be radiant places of deep community and happiness. Our relationships would be less stressful. Our friendships would be far deeper. Our communities would be much more gracious and forgiving.

What is preventing us from becoming that kind of person? Only one thing: our own pride. Our pride gets in the way of so much. When we feel wronged, our pride says things must be set right right now. When we get hurt, our pride says the offender’s “I’m sorry” better come today. When we feel slighted, our pride says we must get what we are owed.

Now, some of us are wounded far more deeply than what my words indicate, and I understand that. I’m not saying that reconciliation is easy, and I’m not suggesting that every struggle with it is a result of our sinful pride. Some wounds are so deep that we are just broken by it.

But how many of us have ex-friends today because we couldn’t, in our pride, find a way to resolve a conflict? How many of us long for right relationships but can’t find a way to reconcile now because we failed so long ago?

Well, there’s hope for us all. By grace, we can reverse course right now. We can trust Jesus to show us what it is like to be a minister of reconciliation because He’s a professional, and He will help us. Why would He not? He’ll get all the glory, and we’ll get all the joy He truly wants for us.

David McLemore serves as an elder at Refuge Church in Franklin, Tennessee. He is a regular contributor to Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary’s For the Church website and a staff writer at Gospel-Centered Discipleship.